Eleven years ago you were born to a teenage mom didn’t know where life would take you. You’ve taking the stage and own it in every way. 2015 you have won the title of “Mini Best Dancer”. Proud to say your my granddaughter. Keep up the good work.
Why am I afraid to say what I truly feel. Why do I feel that the words would be taken out of context. Well I won’t be afraid to voice my opinion and my thoughts. Since the election I’ve been thinking I need to know the address and location of the party I voted for so that I can make my face be known, and my voice be heard. I did not vote her in for her to just help her own. She was voted in to help all Canadians. I for one don’t like to see that we are invisible though they call us visible minority, I go to the bank and we are not there, I go to retail store we are barely there, go to an office same thing..everywhere I go I am thinking where are we and what can we do to change this. It is time we stand up and be recognize for what we can bring to the table. You don’t have to agree or disagree this is what I truly see.
Today, as I sat looking out in my backyard and how beautiful it was before a certain someone decided to reconstruct the shed. Initially, my thoughts were I’ve spent 3 years to get the garden how I wanted it and in one afternoon, boards, household items were spread across the grass cutting off their circulation. Before I was able to complete my thought. Honestly, a quiet voice just interrupted by thought ” look again it’s beautiful”. A butterfly appeared and the beauty of the garden was all I could see. I went out took these pictures, smile at not what I created in my backyard but what God Created for us all. I am thankful that I am listening to everything the Almighty shows me and with that I love everything that appears out of place. I am thankful that I can now look at things in a positive way. I appreciate that certain someone who decided to fix the shed before further damage. Lesson learned.
Sometimes in life decisions are automatically made for you. Raising 5 children was not a easy task, you do what you have to do to survive. I have had many jobs, noticed I said jobs not a career. I don’t have a career because I did not go to college, I have a job and I am grateful for that. I sacrificed so that they could have. Fast forward, when should one stop sacrificing for their children so that they can have? I am grateful that I have a job, however is that job enough. I woke up thinking about an incident that happened yesterday at work, it is speaking volume to my heart. This could be the time to reevaluate my life and my job. The only thing is that I don’t know what I truly want to do in life. Let me explain throughtout the years I have many interest a lawyer was top on my list, a nurse I wanted to be as young child. As I am older what is it that I truly want to do, how do I get there. I am willing to take that journey through life and commit to documenting it where it will take me I don’t know. For the first time in my life I am not interested in multilevel marketing companies ie MaryKay, Primerica, etc. I want to get that degree and if I choice to do the multilevel marketing after then so be it.
Today, I would like to share my journey as a poet. Growing up I enjoyed music, and never knew how to sing or to carry a note. I was in a girls group in church and hated yes hated my voice. So, on my lifes journey I went minding my own business.Then one that real poem hit me from my gut and it was as if I was praying and asking for a cleansing of some sort and I found a release his name is Jesus he blessed me with my inner thought and through that I started writing and looking at my life and the journey I have been on from birth, motherhood, wife, daughter, sister, cousin etc. Loving this journey and the poems that I have been able to write soothing my soul and sharing my journey with my inner circle. One day soon I hope to share it with the world as it is not just my story.
Last night as we sit around the house not actually waiting for New Years to arrive but enjoying the time off. For the first time, no plans for New Year’s Eve but to stay home. I was so relaxed and ready to lay in bed until the countdown comes 10..9..8…7..6..5…4..3..2..1 Happy New year. I missed the count down. I spent it putting my grandchild to bed as he cries for his mommy. I felt as if I was reliving a part of my life when I use to leave my children with my mother so that I too can go out to celebrate New Years. The natural circle of life is upon me. My children are grown doing their own thing and I now am a grandmother doing my duty and that is babysitting and allowing the yourng people to go out and enjoy their time.
In 36 year of being a mother 2014 has thought me how to seperate myself from this mother journey, not completly but enough to find my truth my been and where I belong.
I did find my spiritual truth and I am so thankful that 2014 I’ve paid attention to what is really important.
In the beginning of this journey outside of being mother, I did not know who Jennifer was and throught poetry I found her, I admire her (yes in 3rd person), this girl able to say what she wants and need and not butting head with anyone. Refusing to be that person. I forgive everyone that hurt me and continue to try and hurt me.
I did now get there on my own through building a relationship with Jesus Christ I have arrived.
See you in 2015.. Happy New Year